One of my girls seems to scratch her sister when she wants a toy, does not get her way or is just angry. This is not just confined to one of them; it does happen with both girls, although it is one child that does it more often.
I have been putting the offending child into time out, as this behaviour is not acceptable and I want it to stop. Although bad, the behaviour got me thinking of why it is happening in the first place.
Is she angry, sad, or just not able to express herself to her sister or to me? I do ask her what the issue is and mostly I get tears and sad looks. She knows she has done wrong, however it still happens again and again.
I tell her that she can tell me anything, and that I will listen to what she has to say. I do get stories of wonderful things and sometimes I get the fact that sister has taken a toy, or pushed her and other such things. Then mummy has to dish out punishments all round. Pity the twins don’t have separate rooms; this would make time out or punishments so much easier. You go to your room, and you go to yours! Perils of living in a small house I guess.
Are you in the same boat regarding this bad behaviour? I know it is the stage of the pre-schooler, but it is just a terrible situation as one child seems to get hurt more often than the other. I don’t want one to be traumatised due to me not acting quickly and making sure to put a stop to this naughtiness. I do act quickly and make sure that the naughty person is in time out while the one that got hurt is cuddled and feeling the love.
Some great links that might help if you are in the same situation:
- Parenting Support: Tantrums and Troubles – Net Mums
- Fighting And Biting – American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry
I am sure that I am doing what is right; I just wish it was making a difference now; maybe it just takes more time? Are you dealing with this at your home? Do you find that when you turn your back that World War 3 erupts?
Do you to tell the kids to be in different areas of the room so that they don’t hurt each other? Most of the time the girls are just lovely, I think this stage is just getting me down a bit. It does get worse when the kids are tired and have had a long day. I suppose when I am tired I am not nice either. Send in your comments, tips/tricks and stories.
Leanne hionisJuly 17, 2012
I’m in same situation with my 2. Every single day I go through it at least 3-4 times with each child being naughty to the other. It is an age thing im sure but also has alot in my house to do with getting attention from me whether it’s negative or not. I turn my back for 1 second and miss 3.5 is riding her bike on top of her 22mth old brother or biting his hand, pushing him, spitting. Etc etc and then mr 22mths now picks up this behaviour and pushes, pulls hair, steals toys from her. We do time out, take threaten no specidl outings etc but same things happen over and over and over again- so much so we have sought the help of a child therapist to see what the problem is