With Kate Middleton due to have her second child any day, there has been a tonne of advice about going from one to two children.
It has taken me back to my early days with my mother’s group when I first had the twins.
Okay, well I had two children right off the bat but had I not had twins, I may have shared the anxieties many of the women in my mother’s group. [Don’t get me wrong – I still had anxieties, ‘wow, how am I going to cope with twins?’]
The mum’s in my group wondered: How were they going to manage going from being mum to one, to mum to two and still leave the house?
How would they get out the door weighed down with enough stuff to appear as if they were leaving home never to return?
How would they get their older child off to school when new bub is napping?
They were all so worried that the difficulty factor would be so overwhelming it would be easier to just stay in.
Below is a great quote from Mindy @ Keeper of the Home.
“I have accepted the fact that I will need to find a new normal! I’m still working toward what that is going to look like, but I know that we will get eventually there. And although there are days that are tough, when I look at these two sweet babies of mine I know that it is oh so worth it!”
Well, I can tell you from navigating all those challenges but without a running start, that you will do it.
Of course Kate will probably have a nanny for each child making life a tad easier.
For the rest of us mere mortals, I would share my own experience. I remember when I was worried about how I would cope with the twins.
I did stay in the house for a bit and was very concerned that I might not be able to work my pram. What if there was an issue? I would be on my own! I practiced putting the pram up and down in the house and when I was confident I ventured out with the babies.
It did not matter if it was to window shop at a major shopping centre or just chill under a tree at the park. We were out of the house and for me that felt like a success.
I had the pram in the boot, I strapped kids in car then once we arrived at our destination I somehow managed to assemble the pram and get two babies onboard. When that mission was accomplished, I was on top of the world.
If you had seen me then, you would have spotted a woman walking around the shopping centre with a big smile plastered on her face. I know it was a small thing to do in the scheme of life, but I thought it was an amazing accomplishment. I got out of the house with two babies! Yeah, Me!
“Children reinvent your world for you”
I have spoken to many mum’s bracing themselves for the shock of having two children.
Reading about Kate’s impending birth – and the interesting Women’s Weekly cover all about how George will cope (anyone else think that a bit odd?) it hit me, I have no concept of having one child.
However, for those about to know what caring for two children is like, here is my two cents for what it’s worth:
- It’s okay to feel a bit daunted
- It is hard but it won’t be hard for long. You got number one to sleep through the night and got him/her potty trained. That part for me was fun –double the challenge but once we were through it, we were done. Bravo.
- Soon your little baby will sleep longer and you will get more rest. It will all just work fine.
- Remind yourself that you did it once and you can do it again.
- Having a schedule is great too. Make sure that the baby sleeps and eats at certain times.
- The new baby has to adjust to life in your house, if you have some noise don’t suddenly become a super quiet household due to your new little person. I know sleeping time needs to be quite but you have to live life as well. A little bit of noise will not hurt, as long as it is within reason. I think the baby will adjust.
- Don’t forget playtime and having a bit of sunshine does help you feel good and helps baby as well. Make sure to pick the safe times in the day to be out and about.
Having two kids is great; they can play together and will hopefully be great company for each other. It is nice that we have given each child a sister and having that support is lovely in life.
The most important thing I think is: Getting out and about
I must say the biggest challenge is getting out of the house and to all the normal appointments that you keep. Just putting yourself out there no matter how small the step is a wonderful achievement.
You should have been a fly on the wall when I managed to get kids in the crèche at the gym and be in an aqua aerobics class, now I felt that this was deserving of an award! Have you done something similar that you were super proud of when the kids were babies?
Not only did I get two kids fed, dressed and in the car. We arrived at the gym at the right time, I got them into care and I made my exercise class. Again I was the mad woman in the pool smiling at how brilliant this all was. I might have looked strange, but I did not care. I was at the gym. I was exercising and I got there with little babies with me. I was very happy! Did you have moments like this?
Are you about to have your second child?
Have you had other mums or parents confide or seek advice on having two kids rather than one? Let us know.
“Every baby born into the world is a finer one than the last”
I do wish Kate Middleton well and hope all goes well for baby number two. Also if anyone else is set to have their second, third or more I wish you all well too.